11 Comments

  1. Marlene
    November 10, 2014 @ 8:07 am

    My husband got started through the gym he belonged to hearing other guys talking about doing triathlons. 5 years later…..My best tip to you would be to set boundaries up front. Also depends on if you have kids and how much time will be taken away from the family. Good luck and have fun!

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    • jbswdz
      November 10, 2014 @ 9:24 am

      Thanks Marlene. I keep hearing that communication is key. What kind of boundaries did you set – time, money? – Holly

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  2. Annmarie
    November 10, 2014 @ 8:28 am

    I think it is so awesome that you are so supportive of his new “hobby”. While I don’t compete in triathlons nor does my husband we have friends who do and I know it can be a huge time commitment!

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    • jbswdz
      November 10, 2014 @ 9:26 am

      Thanks Annemarie. I’m getting nervous about the time commitment for next year when he trains for the full distance race. I have one child in high school and one in college, so no little ones to worry about at least. For right now I’m happy he’s found a healthy hobby…. – Holly

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  3. Susan
    November 11, 2014 @ 10:40 pm

    Glad your having fun, beware of the time you will be surprised how many races on your anniversary and birthday. I guess my best advice is learn to live with one who becomes very selfish, it’s the nature of the beast with extreme training,

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    • jbswdz
      November 11, 2014 @ 10:52 pm

      Thanks Susan. Sad, but true, at many times during training and I’m sure many of us have lived through the “it is all about me” phase. Will make sure Holly sees your comment. I think I’m going to do a piece on the best words of wisdom to the new triwife. Can I use yours?

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  4. Holly
    November 12, 2014 @ 4:24 pm

    Hi everyone. Just wanted to thank you for your words of wisdom, some a little scary, but greatly appreciated. I’m sure I will be needing more advice along the line, so I’ll be back with more questions. Thanks again.

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  5. Rebecca
    November 12, 2014 @ 9:23 pm

    This was my husband’s first tri season…and I had NO idea what we were in for! The training was one thing, but the exhaustion from the training, and the preoccupation were also rough. Definitely set boundaries, even more important with younger kids. We have 3 and 5 year old boys, so race days were a interesting combination of fun, boredom, frustration, and excitement. All that said, it’s amazing to see them accomplish such big goals! The boys and I were so proud to see him finish, and place in his age group the first year, such a great role model for our kids!

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    • jbswdz
      November 12, 2014 @ 9:43 pm

      Hi Rebecca. Thanks so much for your input. He must be a really good athlete! Is he doing more races next year and if so, have you been part of the decision? I love how you experienced the gamut of emotions at the race, but you are so right….

      Reply

  6. Holly Brinkley
    July 31, 2015 @ 4:47 pm

    I would love to hear more about what kind of boundaries and how others live with the “all about me” phase. My husband has been competing for 8 years now and I know better communication would be helpful.

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    • TriWivesClub
      July 31, 2015 @ 6:29 pm

      Holly, it is tough and for each couple it is very different. I am in no way an expert but what works for me is this. Be clear with your feelings and state that they are your feelings, talk about the training schedule and what is best for you all as a couple and/or family. Keep asking questions so that your athlete’s need and wants are clear and state yours too. At the beginning of the week I always ask why kind of workout week it is and this helps me prepare too. Be clear on how you feel. We have made changes along the way to find what works best for us NOW, because it will change in a few weeks. The sport of triathlons is a demanding sport no matter how you look at it and one of the only sports that non-professionals take it on as a part time job with their training. I am sorry to say that the mindset might not change but the way in which we deal with it has. At the end of the day the triathlete and the family put in a lot of money, training time, food prep time and more for what to some seems very little. But by talking and creating an environment where your athletes needs and your needs are clear it can become a better world. It is not a “me” sport, your triathlete will realize what it took from you and the family to get to the starting line.

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